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Honestly Lisa

♥Honestly Lisa is a Pu Pu Platter of my life. Once a week I will conduct(formal I know) interviews with everyone from family,, guru's, exboyfriends, childhood friends, thought leaders and maybe even Oprah in search of who I am and what I'm supposed to be. when I grow up. There is salty language, talk of sex , feelings, and spiritual stuff. So you may not want to listen in front of the kids or your coworkers. Love Bites are audio clips based on real conversations from my love life, featuring my friend Robbie Rist, who plays every man who has graced my path. Men Are People Too, where I interview a variety of men; comedians, actors, musicians, artists, writers, computer programmers, yoga guru's, to gain a sometimes hilarious and sometimes serious perspective on how men see love, sex and relationships from their side of the ship. Ladies, you will learn so much about men! Listen in and hear the truth. And sometimes I will just share random musings on life, love, fashion and food or anything else that strike my fancy. And that’s the magpie.
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Now displaying: September, 2016
Sep 30, 2016

I never expected to have a child. Never. But then I decided maybe I wanted to. 

My spiritual, jewelry designing daughter, Becca Cuellar. 

Can't remember when we met, how rude. Doesn't know how long we've known each other. 

But I remember her in my uterus! I made her!

She and I are very close, it's just the two of us. 

We weren't a religious family, but enjoyed the traditions. Loved participating with Bubbie (My mom) and loved being fed ice cream at nine months.

"Do you think you picked me out before you came?" - Lisa

oh totally!

"Was it embarrassing that I was a comic?" - Lisa

"I love being able to say I slept in a lot of backs of theatres when I was a kid"- Becca

I'm afraid she inherited my "artistic, sort-of let's make things all the time," and it's hard to make a living when you're making art all the time. 

Becca dislikes that she spends money like I do. 

"Neither of us know how to use what we do to make money" - Becca

Why does shopping make us feel better?

"How we picked out all this stuff, nobody knows" - Becca

"We are insane at manifesting clothing, but not the money to buy the clothing" - Lisa

Selling your clothes at wasteland, and crossroads, and how it feels like selling your soul. 

The Thrift Mission - They have a Becca collection! Email to find out how to donate to them.

"If us buying clothing, in turn made someone else happy, then I am so okay with that" - Becca

"My friends line up at my back door to go through my clothes before I give them away" - Lisa

My friends get so much joy out of my old clothing. We are extremely gifted at manifesting clothing, we help others find things!

The moral of the story: JUST TRY IT ON.

We are so open to all the different opportunities and options, and we know that we would love to be surprised by joy. This is manifestation, just give it a try!

Did my daughter suck me into the yoga and spiritual life?

And I mean, really sucked in because we are both obsessed. 

But we have such a close relationship, and we do fight, it happens. But we've traveled all over the country, and been to Paris together. (with all kinds of gauntlets. Sick for days, bank blocking our funds...)

How does she feel about me dating?

She wants me to be happy.

"I really hope she finds someone before I get married, or this will be depressing" - Becca

Don't hide your emotions and problems from your children.

I passed on my sensitivity to my daughter.

You're not over-sensitive! We just have a better alarm system.

Does it scare you that I might live with you in her old age?

Tantric Numerology

My daughter is a full on believer in all this spiritual stuff. I am way more skeptical. 

She feels as though she was born with belief in spirituality. 

Kundalini Yoga

The ten bodies

"Will you do all 40 days of the meditaion?"- Lisa

I would want to do it, I would plan on it, do five days and take two off and then kick myself for not making it.

Becca moved home after college for six months and I got her the most uncomfortable (BUT SO STYLISH) monk bed. I didn't want to make her too comfortable for fear of becoming Grey Gardens.

Deepak and Oprah 21-day Meditation made Becca have a vision of the future and to stop messing around. It's a really forgiving and gentle meditation program.  (They offer free ones every few months!)

Becca yoga studio hopped all over town. She never paid for a class all summer. And that was a great idea!

I kicked her out because she needed to go live her life in her way. 

Are you embarrassed of me still being in show business?

"No--- You've been doing this a long time" - Becca

"Should I feel self conscious around your boyfriends family?"

No, more and more weird hippies show up, so you're not alone.

I'm asking my daughter what she thinks I should be doing with my life

Making people feel comfortable with themselves and making people laugh. 

"How do you feel like you can give the most to people, in the most natural way possible, what is your most natural way, of giving people joy or comfort?" - Becca

We are learning that we are lucky in our world we can do what we do.

Becca would have dinner with Jean-Luc Picard. Not Patrick Stewart, who Lisa sees at her local ice cream shop all the time. 

"I don't want to be cliche, but I really want to talk to Jesus" - Becca

Thinking about how my mom died 20 years from now. Does it scare Becca that I die?

No, she believes in technology.

What does she think of my boyfriend? "you're both so youthful in spirit"

Is it weird to smoke pot with my boyfriend? 

"No, it's a comfort level thing" 

What about my old boyfriends?

Being with someone because you both just really need someone.

"He has secrets, and I don't like that."- Becca

Becca yelled at my ex boyfriend through text message when he accidentally texted me. I thought we were getting back together!

Saying goodbye to my mom (Becca's Bubbie) when Becca was away on tour

We wondered if she never felt accomplished. We are both carrying on the support torch for her. 

What does waking up feeling like a different person feel like?

We can shift and change those stories we tell about ourselves. 

Kyle Cease, a comic that became a self-help guy. 

How does she see herself dying? Bicentennial man, dying at home in my sleep with many cyborg body parts.

 

Verbal Rorschach 

Persian rug- rolled up in m corner

tree- redwood

love-fear

pen - pencil

creepy- crapy

dress... by becca

shoe - stilletto

tacos - every day

gluten free pizza - also every day

bubbie- she's with me all the time

kale- salad

roses - thorns

mars - venus

 

verbal Rorschach  part 2

coffee urn - what?!

(I failed as a mother, you don't know what a coffee urn is?)

smelly - blue

wax- ears 

(we may have switched at some point)

horse - shoe

This is terrible

What's your favorite bush? Peaches Impeach my Bush

Sep 27, 2016

========================================

Welcome to Love Bites!

 

Love Bites are based on real conversations from my Love Life.

 

http://www.honestlylisa.com

 

What do you want in a relationship?? Let us know in the comments below and don't forget to check out honestlylisa.com, there is much more.

 

========================================­­===

Love Bite's are from Honestly Lisa the comedy blog for women only.

 

Starring Robbie Rist and Lisa Orkin

Recorded at Double RR Studios: http://doublerrstudios.com/


Go download my free eBook, BE SILLY NOW! http://honestlylisa.com/free-ebook/

 

Website: http://www.honestlylisa.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/lisaorkin

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisaannorkin

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lisaorkin

Pinterest:http://www.pinterest.com/lisaorkin/

Sep 20, 2016

========================================

Welcome to Love Bites!

 

Love Bites are based on real conversations from my Love Life.

 

http://www.honestlylisa.com

 

What do you want in a relationship?? Let us know in the comments below and don't forget to check out honestlylisa.com, there is much more.

 

========================================­­===

Love Bite's are from Honestly Lisa the comedy blog for women only.

 

Starring Robbie Rist and Lisa Orkin

Recorded at Double RR Studios: http://doublerrstudios.com/


Go download my free eBook, BE SILLY NOW! http://honestlylisa.com/free-ebook/

 

Website: http://www.honestlylisa.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/lisaorkin

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisaannorkin

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lisaorkin

Pinterest:http://www.pinterest.com/lisaorkin/

Sep 14, 2016

Your Fans are Waiting - and a spoken word piece at the end--- WHOA!

How would you describe yourself? Motivational person who teaches people how to be their best self and love their best self- and their worst self

Let's take all this and make something out of it.

The best way to describe what i do, is the combination of real tactics and strategies to change your live, to develop your business- primarily through art. Tony Robbins is a huge inspiration. 

Identify who you are at the most raw, most honest, and put those pieces together as a mold and create the individual you see. 

at 6'8" can seem very intimidating, but he is a sweet heart.

The physical represetation of who he is, and the quest to find more transparency in his life.

Grew up in DC in "you've got drive throughs, we've got drive bys"

"I saw more of the artist in you" as he has gotten to know Lisa.

Sanyika hanging out with a friend in a barber shop with his friend who liked to record his thoughts, and the recorder falls out of his pocket and all the guys think they're cops!

There is this weird idea that we have to torture ourselves to create. You can still be an artist and be creative. 

"You don't have to be bound by the same chains of artistry and struggle. Those two things are mutually exclusive. You can still flourish and prosper." - Sanyika

[Tweet theme="basic-white"]"The demonization of money is the first way that artists have been held down." @sanyikastreet #honestlylisa[/Tweet]

[Tweet theme="tweet-box-normal-blue"]"If you've played it small long enough, when it looks like things are getting bigger, it gets scary." #honestlylisa[/Tweet]

Fear of bouncing off negative attention, fear of not being able to handle the money (Are you listening universe? I can handle it!) 

Bouncing back and forth between high and low points. "At that low point, eitherI can choose to rise into the person I always imagine myself being, or i can just stay there and hide."

"Rising is scary" - Lisa

"Hiding is not a life satisfied" - Lisa

Listening to the heart lately, trusting things will be fine as they grow.

Everyone wanted Sanyika to fit into the mold, help them move.  "I am the pick up truck" because he's big and strong. But he organizes the truck--- not even do the heavy lifting!

Metaphor for what he does now! Wow!

[Tweet theme="tweet-box-normal-blue"]"The way you organize and empower people to do good is by asking the powerful questions" @SanyikaStreet #honestlylisa[/Tweet]

It feels like an impossible task to be honest with yourself. 

"It's so easy to lie when you're 6'8" and 300lbs. Everyone thinks you're a celebrity."-Sanyika

"I never want to walk the red carpet because I feel so invisible." - Lisa

Sanyika realized that red carpets are for selling yourself or something, so he rarely walks one. 

"If you are caught up in a world where you are not being honest with yourself, then no one can help you- no one knows what your challenges are." - Sanyika

This process of revelation, vulnerability began with a video blog to tell his story. 

Lisa finds it easier to tell the truth on stage than real life.

How do you find that? Meditation? Therapy?

"We aren't really learning anything new about ourselves, it's more about a revelation process." - Sanyika

If you keep hiding, you're going to betray the people who instilled the confidence in you, and the people you could be helping. - Lisa/Sanyika

Fans - Real people, maybe even your family and friends for you to be inspirational for. Not even Beyonce status.

How do you not shit all over who you were, not that you're feeling better. 

"The greatest gift in that struggle is humility" - Sanyika

The inability to embrace people you don't agree with, when you're trying to teach the world to be more accepting.

Sanyika's Instagram for awesome videos every day

This has to resonate with me first, anything he wants to teach someone else.

"There's nothing more impactful than doing something every day." -Sanyika

Some mornings you don't want to do it, but every day you have a choice. It's a very simple equation. 

We have choices for more than whats for dinner. Even feelings, "I don't have to feel that way." 

"It's so real to me, so grounded in my reality and who I am" - Sanyika, on sharing videos every day

That reality guides him. It has to come from the right place.

"I am the happiest I've ever been on this planet, and that is the most powerful I can be" - Sanyika

I just want to absorb his happiness! I don't know what happiness is most of the time.

How shaving your boyfriend's back can bring intimacy - it's not the moments you think they are!

We are monkeys grooming each other, nothing more intimate. 

"It's not the award on the stage. It is the impact of great moments in your life aligning at the right time " -Sanyika

--Or the ability to see it! - Lisa

 

We are searching for the path, we want to know the way. 

Things we aspire to 1) Better quality of life, and 2) Better quality relationships

We are really not in this alone, we are sharing a human experience.

Incubating your own ideas feels like insanity. OR asking everyone else what to do. Where are you in this?

"We must pursue information with the curiosity of a 5 year old, and with the diligence to challenge everyone." -Sanyika

You have to do the work on your own, and then ask others when you hit a roadblock.

If you want to find the answers, you need to ask the questions and surround yourself with others who will ask you questions for you to answer!

Be wary of people who tell you what to do. No one can tell you what to do, when you want something in your heart. 

[Tweet theme="tweet-box-normal-blue"]"As people we underestimate the importance of communities." @SanyikaStreet #honestlylisa #honestlylisapodcast[/Tweet]

Biggest punishment in society-- solitary confinement. "

We punish ourselves by trapping ourselves in our own ideas. The first thing you do is be honest!" - Sanyika

Make sure you watch Tony Robbin's documentary "I am Not Your Guru" - bust down your misperceptions, because he is amazing at helping people.

Communities are critical to advancing society, because we can't replicate our individual selves.

We have a gift, but there are other things we aren't good at, and we need help. 

How do I create a community, get people to help me with what I'm doing?

"You have to have a message that's greater than you" - Sanyika

You think that people gravitate toward you because you're the hero. But there is a journey that that hero embarks upon- They are searching for a mentor.

The mentor empowers the hero to be their best self. 

Follow the formula that relates to the client/customer/audience. It's never been about you.

Danielle LaPorte's Desrie Map - Figuring out what motivates your soul, and being honest and going through ups and downs with yourself. 

Dinner Dead or Alive: Tony Robbins

Being open to the possibilities of what your desires show to you. Not getting caught up in the original goal. 

What do I want to do? What are the actions I need to do to get there?

VERBAL RORSCHACH 

Love - Warmth

Confusion - Fear

planets - aligned

chinese food - amazing

shoes - big

stars - overrated

hats - don't fit on my head

tacos - on every corner in a taco truck

peace - always

motivation - nothing without action

roses - a reminder to stay grounded

dirt - the truth

 

 

 

 

How to leave a love note on iTunes for my Podcast.

From your computer:

1. Open the iTunes software on your desktop. (Not the web version.)

2. In the search bar (upper right-hand corner), type in “Honestly Lisa”.

3. Click on our album cover that pops up towards the bottom of the screen. 4. This will take you to the homepage for our show, but make sure you don’t accidentally select one of our individual episodes instead.

5. Right under the show description, you’ll see three tabs. “Ratings & Reviews” is the second one listed, and this is the one you want to click on.

6. On that page, there should be a button called “Write A Review” and if you click there, it will hopefully let you create a post with your thoughts!

From your iPhone:

1. Open the “podcast” app that comes pre-installed on all current apple smartphone devices.

2. In the lower right-hand corner, you’ll click on the magnifying glass “search” button and type in “marriage is funny”.

3. Click on our album cover that pops up towards the bottom of the screen. This will take you to the homepage for our show, but make sure you don’t accidentally select one of our individual episodes instead.

4. Select the “reviews” tab toward the top of the screen, and you’ll see a purple “Write a Review” button on the next page.

5. It might ask you to log in to your iTunes account, but otherwise, this will open a form where you can enter your thoughts!

Sep 13, 2016

========================================

Welcome to Love Bites!

 

Love Bites are based on real conversations from my Love Life.

 

http://www.honestlylisa.com

 

What do you want in a relationship?? Let us know in the comments below and don't forget to check out honestlylisa.com, there is much more.

 

========================================­­===

Love Bite's are from Honestly Lisa the comedy blog for women only.

 

Starring Robbie Rist and Lisa Orkin

Recorded at Double RR Studios: http://doublerrstudios.com/


Go download my free eBook, BE SILLY NOW! http://honestlylisa.com/free-ebook/

 

Website: http://www.honestlylisa.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/lisaorkin

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisaannorkin

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lisaorkin

Pinterest:http://www.pinterest.com/lisaorkin/

Sep 8, 2016

Shannon Bobo

I really just think if I have her close to me for 50 minutes, then I can grab some of that youthful exuberance, that vivaciousness, that positive feeling that it will stick to me like glue..



 

"I just have this zest for life, I guess. It's not always easy, I can tell you that. It's a choice. A moment by moment choice" - Shannon

"Unless you're about to fly me somewhere or pay me something, you don't need to know how old I am" - Shannon

Did stand up for youth christian highschool kids, no wonder she felt she didn't do so well.

Why we don't really care if our family and friends come out to see our stand up.

Shannon is live streaming comedy for sonicbox up to seven hours, daily. Not porn-actually! People listen all day at work, and she's actually developing a fan base.

This video "The Struggle is Real" about online dating!

"I don't believe in god outside of us" - Shannon on asking for energetic help when she needs it.

She grew up in a non-denominational christian church with gospel and shaming, "Beat you up type church." It felt so wrong to her that the pastor was driving a Cadillac from multiple passings of the collection plat--and the toilets in the church didn't flush.

"In order to not feel bad about all the wrongs all the time, we have to make fun of it to ourselves"-Lisa

Shannon was way more interested in having intelligent conversations with the grown ups and they were always telling her to get out and play.

She came to LA to be an actor, but didn't believe it could be a practical career for her, so she worked in casting.

"I will make the rules in life as long as it's kindness" - Lisa

"I'm learning about myself, by who I want to be around" - Shannnon

"What is it about me, that I see in him?" - Shannon

It's not necessary to be the broke actor, casting is such a weird crap shoot, you can't get caught up in it because it's a numbers lottery.

"If the job is yours, it was always yours. If you didn't book it, it was never yours." - Shannon

"I never let one thing be my source." Shannon on moving on when her jobs weren't working out.

Shannon grew up half in Evanston, IL  "Moral-Obama-Black sort of thing, street but sweet" - Shannon

"I think all my high school friends who thought I was weird think I'm cool now"- Lisa + Shannon

She followed her boyfriend to college in Madison, and he broke up with her right before school started!

Last boyfriend was a minister of new thought, old wisdom and was super manipulative. After they were together for 3-4 years, he turned around and said something completely different.

Manifesting manipulation: Trump seems pretty happy with all his money, even though he does horrible things.

Online dating doesn't work for us. "They are always much shorter than they say" but it's okay because her friends fix her up all the time.

The Four Man Plan by Cindy Lewis - That book did not work for Shannon. It was way too much work, even though getting the date wasn't the hard part.

"He tried to kiss me and I wanted to throw up" - Shannon on dating against your type and forcing it.

"So do you think he was farting out of anger?" - Lisa

"You don't want me, and I'm good with that- I want everyone in the whole world to like me, and that is bad." - Lisa

"I don't feel bad at all, cause I dodged the bullet" - Shannon on guys being mean after she turns them down.

"If someone doesn't like you, it has everything to do with them, nothing to do with you" - Shannon

Dinner with: Beyonce

"Even Beyonce gets cheated on" - Lisa

"No one is exempt" - Shannon from real life pain, like cheating.

Judd Apatow telling her a sarcastic "Good luck with that." Re: stand up, lit the fire under her.

"I gave up fighting for things that aren't mine" - Shannon

The sheer will to live life fully expressed - where does that come from? Rough childhood and knowing the most horrible things have happened already.

When everything is full of love and like a dream, it makes her feel like "I want the experience of having a husband and child" - Shannon

When her best friend got married, she wasn't jealous, but she saw the beauty of her love and wanted it for herself.

After the farting guy, she just decided not to date. That's a real talent, he should be on america's got talent.

PSA to men with farty cars - open the windows.

"Passive aggressive farting is not something you want in a relationship" - Lisa

How are you going to die? Old age, just not waking up one day.

"Par for the course of being Jewish is that you just think a lot about how you're going to die. And you think whenever anything in your body hurts, its because you're dying. It's the Woody Allen Syndrome." - Lisa

Verbal Rorschach

yellow - happy

bluebird - joy

toast - ew!

love - I can't wait to find the one

giggles - you keep making me giggle

eyebrows - oh they better be on point all the time!

paris - that's where I want to go next year, I can't wait to visit by myself

sombrero - back to Mexico

Chinese food - hot and sour soup

pizza - gluten free

jewels - LOVE

color - always a splash of color

mountains - can't wait to climb as many of them as possible

 

 

How to leave a love note on iTunes for Honestly Lisa Podcast.

From your computer:

1. Open the iTunes software on your desktop. (Not the web version.)

2. In the search bar (upper right-hand corner), type in “Honestly Lisa”.

3. Click on our album cover that pops up towards the bottom of the screen. 4. This will take you to the homepage for our show, but make sure you don’t accidentally select one of our individual episodes instead.

5. Right under the show description, you’ll see three tabs. “Ratings & Reviews” is the second one listed, and this is the one you want to click on.

6. On that page, there should be a button called “Write A Review” and if you click there, it will hopefully let you create a post with your thoughts!

From your iPhone:

1. Open the “podcast” app that comes pre-installed on all current apple smartphone devices.

2. In the lower right-hand corner, you’ll click on the magnifying glass “search” button and type in “marriage is funny”.

3. Click on our album cover that pops up towards the bottom of the screen. This will take you to the homepage for our show, but make sure you don’t accidentally select one of our individual episodes instead.

4. Select the “reviews” tab toward the top of the screen, and you’ll see a purple “Write a Review” button on the next page.

5. It might ask you to log in to your iTunes account, but otherwise, this will open a form where you can enter your thoughts!

 

Sep 6, 2016

========================================

Welcome to Love Bites!

 

Love Bites are based on real conversations from my Love Life.

 

http://www.honestlylisa.com

 

What do you want in a relationship?? Let us know in the comments below and don't forget to check out honestlylisa.com, there is much more.

 

========================================­­===

Love Bite's are from Honestly Lisa the comedy blog for women only.

 

Starring Robbie Rist and Lisa Orkin

Recorded at Double RR Studios: http://doublerrstudios.com/


Go download my free eBook, BE SILLY NOW! http://honestlylisa.com/free-ebook/

 

Website: http://www.honestlylisa.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/lisaorkin

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisaannorkin

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lisaorkin

Pinterest:http://www.pinterest.com/lisaorkin/

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